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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/30020733">It's only up from here</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/ninthdreamie/pseuds/ninthdreamie'>ninthdreamie</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>NCT (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - College/University, And they were dormmates. (Oh my god they were dormmates), Developing Relationship, M/M, No Plot/Plotless, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, something cosmic's going on if u squint</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 22:35:45</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,448</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/30020733</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/ninthdreamie/pseuds/ninthdreamie</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Dejun and Guanheng spend time together on their dormitory's rooftop, and come to realize many things.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Wong Kun Hang | Hendery/Xiao De Jun | Xiao Jun</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>56</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>It's only up from here</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/aftermidnights/gifts">aftermidnights</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>this is for mich! &lt;3 happy birthday to us. i hope this fic is good enough to give you a lot of comfort, like how meeting you in the cursed blue bird app did. ily</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Being on the dormitory’s rooftop and seeing the city they’re in, still so vibrant and alive although it’s midnight, makes Dejun feel very sentimental. It’s to the point of tears, actually, but he decides to blame this want to cry on the drink he’s having.</p>
<p>Two years ago, those city lights were rather scarier than calming. He was just a guy who wanted to pursue his studies in South Korea, because he wanted to be somewhere that isn’t home; he believes he has been in his comfort zone for most of his life, and thus wanted to branch out.</p>
<p>Indeed, moving into a new country is a challenge. In this place, he feels like a lost child in a twenty-three year old’s body, constantly overwhelmed by new discoveries that it’s exhausting. Regardless, the exhaustion he experiences is worth it.</p>
<p>Despite all the good times that are too many to mention them all, there were also hard times. Dejun would be lying if he said that he never cried in a comfort room throughout his first year of living here. It would sometimes start with him fantasizing of spending most of his life in Seoul, then he’d take it back a second after due to his longing for his family.</p>
<p>Aside from that struggle, Korean is hard. The way the language’s grammar works still confuses him to this day, and sometimes, one word can mean many things depending on context and sentence structure, which is why Dejun opts for talking less in case he might say something wrong.</p>
<p>The university culture here is very different from back home too, but it isn’t a really big issue for him. What Dejun can only consider his big problem is again, his homesickness. On some nights like this, it would be too much to bear that he would resort to busying himself with songwriting and the like, so he wouldn’t dwell in his despair.</p>
<p>But nowadays, he can say that he is managing it well.</p>
<p>“Dejun, I bought more drinks!”</p>
<p>All because of someone who speaks the same language as him.</p>
<p>Dejun tears his eyes away from the view, and lights up at the sight of the plastic bag Guanheng is holding. Indeed, he really kept his promise and purchased more bottles of flavored soju.</p>
<p>“Bring ‘em over here,” Dejun says enthusiastically, causing Guanheng to start laughing. He watches Guanheng walk over to him with the plastic bag; there’s a bounce in his steps.</p>
<p>“Finally, we’re getting a break.” Guanheng plops down next to Dejun, carefully placing the plastic bag between them. “We really needed it after all those requirements.”</p>
<p>Thanks to Huang Guanheng’s presence, life in Seoul has been more bearable, and more enjoyable as well. Unlike Dejun who is shy and quiet, Guanheng is energetic and fun to socialize with, despite the stated hindrances. He speaks better Korean than him now too, but is he surprised?</p>
<p>Guanheng <em>is </em>intelligent. He is an engineering major, for pete’s sake.</p>
<p>“<em>You’re </em>the only one who’s free from everything,” Dejun grabs another sip from his half-empty soju. “I still have an essay regarding some music theory due in three days.”</p>
<p>He hears Guanheng let out a pained noise. Even if his current bottle isn’t fully consumed yet, Dejun grabs a new one from the plastic bag, and places it between his crossed legs. “I...wish you the best, I guess?”</p>
<p>Dejun turns to him, wide-eyed. “You could just say ‘good luck,’ y’know. It sounds like you’re sending me off or something.”</p>
<p>The wind brushes through Guanheng’s long locks as he smirks. Dejun lets out a hiccup at the sight, or probably from the alcohol. “Yeah, you’re right. My bad.”</p>
<p>Afterwards, they proceed to drink in silence. This is nothing new to Dejun, since they did start hanging out and spending time together in university over sharing a blueberry soju many nights ago, in this very place.</p>
<p>Now that he thinks about it, could they have still been friends now, if there was no flavored soju involved? <em>How strange</em>, Dejun muses. It’s weird to imagine a world wherein they live in the same dorm and they don’t interact with each other.</p>
<p><em>Strange</em>, Dejun turns to look at Guanheng again, who is already lying down on the mat he laid out before he came here. It seems like the soju is about to make him doze off. Dejun quickly takes off the jacket he is wearing, gently draping it over Guanheng’s frame.</p>
<p>“Why’d you take your jacket off?” <em>Oh</em>, it seems that Guanheng is still conscious. “You’ll get cold too.”</p>
<p>“I’ll be fine,” Dejun assures him, getting back to holding his bottle again after making sure the jacket covers most of Guanheng. “The soju’s going to keep me warm.”</p>
<p>Silence makes its entrance once more. The alcohol’s already starting to sink in, doing funny things to his stomach and making Dejun feel hungry. He glances at Guanheng from time to time, because he’s thinking of how it would feel...<em>weird</em> if they never met and became the good friends that they are today.</p>
<p>Like, there would be a glitch in fate’s massive blueprint if they fail to make him and Guanheng cross paths. It’s as if they were meant to find each other.</p>
<p>
  <em>Ah Dejun, you’re writing another song, aren’t you?</em>
</p>
<p>He shakes his head, hoping that if he does so, the sappy thoughts will finally leave his mind. Then he finally finishes his first bottle, hurriedly opening the second one once it is set aside.</p>
<p>“Jun, I want to tell you something,” Guanheng breaks the silence, gently tugging the hem of Dejun’s shirt.</p>
<p>“Hm?” He turns around, and sees how glassy Guanheng’s eyes are. He is definitely not crying, but the light bulb hanging on top of them gives a certain shine to his brown orbs.</p>
<p>He watches Guanheng open his mouth for a moment, then close it. He pouts, probably doing a mental check if what he’s about to tell him has grammar errors, or something along those lines. Dejun finds the sight incredibly cute; he wants to pinch his cheeks.</p>
<p>After deep contemplation, Guanheng finally opens his mouth. “Just wanted to let you know that I like you.”</p>
<p>Dejun’s eyes widened. “Oh?”</p>
<p>“Like, in a <em>I carry romantic feelings for you </em>kind of way. And it was really just a small crush, but we were having lunch in the uni’s cafeteria and I just had this urge to kiss you on the mouth.” Guanheng is very expressive tonight, and he’s stunned by this very upfront confession. Is it the liquid courage?</p>
<p>His eyes search for a bottle of blueberry soju by Guanheng’s side. He sees one that is already empty. Dejun wants to tease him about his depleting alcohol tolerance, but he chooses not to. He seems to be very sincere.</p>
<p>“You’re so handsome and talented. I like your songs—the ones you made me listen to, at least. I hope you record them and put it in a CD for me.” Guanheng’s request makes Dejun giggle and blush harder than before. “I also love how you always find something to be fascinated about, and how you dump me with information about your musical heroes whenever you can.”</p>
<p>In the midst of his confession, Guanheng’s hand lets go of his shirt and blindly searches for Dejun’s hand. “I love how it feels like I’ve known you for all my life...or all the lives I’ve probably had before this one, whatever. What I’m trying to say is that you give me comfort, by just breathing and drinking soju next to me.”</p>
<p>Dejun finds Guanheng’s hand first, and their fingers intertwine. “And it’s okay if you don’t feel the same way, and if you don’t want to kiss me too. I just wanted to let you know that I really like you, and you’re amazing. Thank you for being here.”</p>
<p>His mind is too hazy to even make fully coherent thoughts right now, but Guanheng’s confession definitely made something <em>click </em>in him. Being confessed to is one of the last things he expected in this chapter of his life, and realizing a millisecond after that he feels the same way is the very last thing he expected to happen right now.</p>
<p><em>Ah</em>, Dejun utters mentally. <em>I must have been giving too much attention to my requirements to notice this. </em>He finds himself smiling so hard that his cheeks hurt.</p>
<p>He places the plastic bag by his side so he can lie next to Guanheng, still not letting go of his hand. It might imply something bad to some, but this is Dejun’s way of accepting Guanheng’s feelings. “Let’s talk about this in the morning.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>thank u for reading!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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